Question: He's 19, and has a drug problem. He's been in rehab. He was clean for four months and is using again. Any recommendations?
One of many possible answers:
Dear “Concerned”
Having to deal with the consequences that are associated with ones actions when out getting high I know are one of the things that can assist in guiding someone towards the road to recovery. This is one of the things I hear most from kids that have helped set them straight, oh and by the way, helped me get straight as well. If your sisters BF can make the consequences unbearable, and embarrassingly so, without them being demoralizing, then more often times then not, kids will try to step up in an effort to shed this association. The last thing they want is to be seen as a "loser" to their friends and peers. They often only care about how their friends view them anyway. So use this to your advantage.
Again, it has to be done in a way that isn’t demoralizing. I can't stress this enough. Tricky I know. You certainly don’t him to build any resentments as this is often used by so many addicts as a reason to go back out and get high. So make sure he does not use and angry or hostile approach. Instead, have him try using one that maintains his boundaries as a dad, expresses his love and concern, and offers his son a glimpse of hope to what the future brings if he maintains a path of sobriety. It's great to show kids that staying sober can be associated with their own future success so if your boyfriends sister can start having him make this connection as opposed to the one that’s traditionally used, a negative one, then I think his son may be more apt to make the change now.
Please keep me posted to your sister’s boyfriend’s sons’ progress! Remember, there is no fail proof answer for this, if this does not work, will have to keep trying.
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Super Star
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