Hello all, I just thought I’d share another one of my stories to show anyone that will listen, just how powerful drug addiction can be - even if a loved one’s life is at its end.
So here it is-
My grandmother and I were extremely close. All while growing up and into adulthood, she was the only other woman on this planet; other than my girlfriend at the time, whom I adored. Although I was living in Chicago and her NY, we’d keep in constant contact with one another via phone and I’d often take the trip out just to see her and take her grocery shopping. I didn’t mind the drive, after all, it gave me a reason to get out and get high along the way. I must have been 27-ish. I was falling deeper into an addiction and I don’t think I really knew it.
She had become extremely ill and had been in the care of Hospice towards the end of her journey. One morning, I had received a call from her. She was not at all sounding like herself. She told me that today was her day and that she was going to “go”. As much as I did not want to believe her words, I felt she was right. As our brief telephone conversation was nearing an end, her words became less and less coherent. I told her not to “go” anywhere without me there to help see her through it. I hung up and quickly packed. I had to get going. I had to be there for her.
On the way out of Chicago, I was full of emotions. I can recall despair and sadness were all I felt and I sure the hell didn’t want to deal with those emotions. In fact, I don't think I even really knew how. I always needed drugs to help me deal with them and this time was no exception. If I were going to be successful at sitting in my truck for the next 12 to make the trek. I had to stop and get some!
I was quickly able to pick up a bit of heroin at a stop I had often frequented. I would have preferred some crack to help me stay awake for the drive but it was all the dealer had so I took it. The problem though, heroin is a downer. It makes me sleepy. That’s obviously not good for someone who needs to be alert for the next 12 hrs. Nevertheless, it wasn’t enough to stop me from taking a hit of it as soon as I got it. So there I was, not even out of the state of Illinois yet and I was already high. My addiction had me and I was already not caring about getting to my grandmother to say good-bye. Crazy how we become different people as soon as we have our drugs in our system.
I could not believe what I was doing. Picking drugs over doing what I knew was right. I was aware enough to know that this time was different and I had to do something, at least for the time being, so I could get to NY and get there sober. I needed an act of god to help me get to her before she passed away.
So I pulled over to the side of the road, and for the next few minutes - prayed.
I had prayed before for assistance but never like this. Each previous time, praying to what I felt were to deaf ears, but not this time. I sat, focused and really felt I had a line of communication to my higher power. I felt it, heard it, and definitely had it; I must have because for the next 12 hour drive, I was suddenly in control.
I was alone with my own thoughts for the next 12 hours and was able to deal with them without the use of drugs as a coping mechanism. This brief moment of clarity did allow me to eventually make it to NY and make it there sober as well.
My grandmother did end up waiting for me that night and remarkably just as I arrived to hold her hand, decided to let “go.” It was one of the most beautiful things I had ever been apart of and I could not have done it at that moment without sobriety in my life.
If you feel this could help someone, please pass it on!
-Super Star
www.rockstarsuperstarproject.com
teenage drug abuse
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Could pot be a problem for anyone? Sure can!
Could pot be a problem for anyone? Sure can!
My view on pot is probably a little less traditional than how most recovering addicts feel about it. I am neither for nor against its legalization, simply because I just do not do it. And since its illegal in almost every state, I do not want to be associated with. I got enough problems to worry about, the last thing I need is to get charged with marijuana possession. I do agree though that pot is not a problem for some and for those that need it for medical purposes, well then they should be allowed access to it. After all, who are we to tell anyone that they should suffer if they have an option not to? However, pot can become an issue for many and become very dangerous. It can even ruin lives. I have seen it first hand in rehab and this email below only confirms my statement. So let us address it.
Dear Super Star,
I need some advice. Help for someone who will not stop smoking pot and is on the verge of loosing everything he owns and loves because of it! I know that he will not quit until he wants to, but I have been trying to get him to quit for years. How do I make him want to quit? He sees his world has fallen apart, has legal issues now and he still won’t stop. It hurts to see him throw his life away like this. He becomes very sarcastic and down right nasty if I suggest counseling. Any suggestions? Help!
Thanks,
-Anonymous
Well anonymous, the unfortunate situation you have to face is that you cannot convince anyone to stop anything. That all has to come from within the one struggling with the addition. To motivate change, one needs a reason. Sometimes it takes rather unfortunate circumstances and consequences for the abuser to stop their drug of choice. However, for some, the trouble they find themselves in is not enough to convince them to do otherwise. This of course is where the professionals often come in, rehabs, drug abuse counselors, etc. An important tool that my brother and I are trying to convey is the tool of “success” that can come from abstinence. Getting an addict to see that success can be found only while sober has helped many that we have met with; decide to at least try it. Help him identify his passion and use that as a tool to help them get excited and enthusiastic about their purpose in life. For me it was helping others with a little music thrown in the mix. For him it may be something different, but whatever it is, have him find it and focus his energies on what makes him happy.
There of course is a lot more to your situation and it’s not as easy to fix as I make it sound. You have to remember, most addicts become so because they have trouble dealing with their feelings, therefore, they use drugs a medicine to help cover them up and sweep them under the carpet, then of course get addicted to the process and the substance itself. INSERT – ADDICTION! That is when experienced professionals can step in and help those that cannot help themselves see that it does not have to be like that any longer. Its never too late to learn how to deal properly with the situations and emotions that life throws at you. However, not everyone is in his or her addiction so deep. Some just need a budge in the right direction and are already in a position to absorb the essential life skills and tools from recovery environments such as AA or NA meetings, books, or even the Rock Star Super Star story, etc.
As far as his nastiness is concerned when your trying make him see that you’re just trying to help. Ignore what is left of it and stop trying so hard. Easier said than done I know. Especially of you’re a mom! The best thing you can do though is to not let yourself become the abused. If he is at a point that the mere mention of him needing help gets him to become irate, then stop making the suggestions. He needs to falter and trip on his own doings. Stop Stop Stop. From an addict’s perspective, it’s just going to develop more unfair resentments towards you and from your point of view; well you just don’t deserve that kind of treatment. If he gets caught, let him go to jail, if he wrecks his car, do not buy him a new one. I am sure you get the point. Remember, he needs a reason to stop, so let him find it and do not take it away from him when he does.
I hope this helps!
If you have any questions you would like to ask Super Star, send me an email at super@superstarsuperstar.com. In addition, don’t forget to pre-order our copy of Serenity from the www.rockstarsuperstarproject.com website. It’s a great way to get the message to the importance of sobriety if your not one who likes to be lectured or read a book! Check out the sample below.
-Super Star
PS. If you think this could help someone, please pass it on!
My view on pot is probably a little less traditional than how most recovering addicts feel about it. I am neither for nor against its legalization, simply because I just do not do it. And since its illegal in almost every state, I do not want to be associated with. I got enough problems to worry about, the last thing I need is to get charged with marijuana possession. I do agree though that pot is not a problem for some and for those that need it for medical purposes, well then they should be allowed access to it. After all, who are we to tell anyone that they should suffer if they have an option not to? However, pot can become an issue for many and become very dangerous. It can even ruin lives. I have seen it first hand in rehab and this email below only confirms my statement. So let us address it.
Dear Super Star,
I need some advice. Help for someone who will not stop smoking pot and is on the verge of loosing everything he owns and loves because of it! I know that he will not quit until he wants to, but I have been trying to get him to quit for years. How do I make him want to quit? He sees his world has fallen apart, has legal issues now and he still won’t stop. It hurts to see him throw his life away like this. He becomes very sarcastic and down right nasty if I suggest counseling. Any suggestions? Help!
Thanks,
-Anonymous
Well anonymous, the unfortunate situation you have to face is that you cannot convince anyone to stop anything. That all has to come from within the one struggling with the addition. To motivate change, one needs a reason. Sometimes it takes rather unfortunate circumstances and consequences for the abuser to stop their drug of choice. However, for some, the trouble they find themselves in is not enough to convince them to do otherwise. This of course is where the professionals often come in, rehabs, drug abuse counselors, etc. An important tool that my brother and I are trying to convey is the tool of “success” that can come from abstinence. Getting an addict to see that success can be found only while sober has helped many that we have met with; decide to at least try it. Help him identify his passion and use that as a tool to help them get excited and enthusiastic about their purpose in life. For me it was helping others with a little music thrown in the mix. For him it may be something different, but whatever it is, have him find it and focus his energies on what makes him happy.
There of course is a lot more to your situation and it’s not as easy to fix as I make it sound. You have to remember, most addicts become so because they have trouble dealing with their feelings, therefore, they use drugs a medicine to help cover them up and sweep them under the carpet, then of course get addicted to the process and the substance itself. INSERT – ADDICTION! That is when experienced professionals can step in and help those that cannot help themselves see that it does not have to be like that any longer. Its never too late to learn how to deal properly with the situations and emotions that life throws at you. However, not everyone is in his or her addiction so deep. Some just need a budge in the right direction and are already in a position to absorb the essential life skills and tools from recovery environments such as AA or NA meetings, books, or even the Rock Star Super Star story, etc.
As far as his nastiness is concerned when your trying make him see that you’re just trying to help. Ignore what is left of it and stop trying so hard. Easier said than done I know. Especially of you’re a mom! The best thing you can do though is to not let yourself become the abused. If he is at a point that the mere mention of him needing help gets him to become irate, then stop making the suggestions. He needs to falter and trip on his own doings. Stop Stop Stop. From an addict’s perspective, it’s just going to develop more unfair resentments towards you and from your point of view; well you just don’t deserve that kind of treatment. If he gets caught, let him go to jail, if he wrecks his car, do not buy him a new one. I am sure you get the point. Remember, he needs a reason to stop, so let him find it and do not take it away from him when he does.
I hope this helps!
If you have any questions you would like to ask Super Star, send me an email at super@superstarsuperstar.com. In addition, don’t forget to pre-order our copy of Serenity from the www.rockstarsuperstarproject.com website. It’s a great way to get the message to the importance of sobriety if your not one who likes to be lectured or read a book! Check out the sample below.
-Super Star
PS. If you think this could help someone, please pass it on!
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