Should you hide the truth about your son/daughters addiction?

Should you hide the truth about your son/daughters addiction?

This is one I face everyday. In fact, from people that you would least expect. This sometimes makes life difficult for me. Thank goodness I am strong in my recovery, but if I were not, I could imagine how I would use something as simple as this as an excuse to go back out and “use”. I’m also not embarrassed by my past. When I was, I was hiding, and guess where? So now I embrace it and I help others do as well. But let’s get into another issue.

Your kids

Adults are different. We have the wherewithal to look ahead and to plan our approach to this subject matter strategically and in a bit less of an abstract manner than our children do. Parents are there to make the decisions that will (hopefully) make a positive impact on the rest of their lives. This includes knowing not telling all your friends and neighbors about your child in addiction.

This is a touchy subject. The last thing we should be doing is enabling our kids. A perfect example of enabling them is not bringing this subject into light. However, it should only go so far. As a parent, think about whom you are talking to. You should talk outloud about this subject within the confines of your home and amongst family but don’t make it a habit to run around telling all your all your acquaintances. We all know how fast rumors and false stories start to spread. If you let the world know about your child’s drinking issue, you know it’s only a matter of time before the story morphs into him/her having an extreme heroin addiction. Also, take into consideration his future intentions with college or employers. Even though unfortunate, these future relationships may never kindle. That’s sad considering those in recovery are most often than not, highly intelligent with above average IQ’s.

So don’t go “blabbing it around town.”

Especially out of spite to your child’s behavior and addiction. This will only make this worse and cause a rift between you and your child. They will lose trust in you an ultimately develop resentment towards you, which may lead to more “use”. Instead, choose whom you tell carefully. If you do it to vent and feel better then that’s ok. If you do it to help you formulate opinions, that is ok too! Just be aware to your reasoning when discussing this with friends and family, if its for the right reason, then no harm no foul.

Its important to talk to people about this subject as you also need to heal and mend, just be careful with whom you are talking too.

Super Star
Crusader for Sobriety
www.weareoneonline.org